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четверг, 19 мая 2011 г.

Reader's Digest Funny Notes on Rent and Dating

Paying your rent and breaking up can be equally painful, at least this is what Reader's Digest suggests (RD June/July 2011). Rent is sometimes too high, and nobody likes just "giving it away" to your landlord at the end of the month. There are some tenants however that come up with creative excuses to avoid paying it.

"With my daughter's graduation, our new boat, and our trip to Europe this year, we're a little strapped."
  • "I'm getting real tired of paying this rent every month! You'll have to wait a few more days."
  • "We're a little short right now. But don't worry - we're getting a refund on my wife's tattoo. The artist messed it up, and we're getting back most of the bucks!"
  • "I didn't pay the rent because I'm saving up to move."
  • "It's your fault the check bounced. Why didn't you tell me you were going to run to the bank the very same day!"
Here are some examples of how dating can be complicated:
  • "Right after we broke up, my ex-girlfriend called to ask how to change her relationship status on Facebook."
  • "I got into a 90-minute argument with my girlfriend because she was adamant that Moby Dick was a true story. I finally let her win so I could go to sleep."
  • "My now ex-girlfriend and I were in my room one day, and the Internet was particularly slow. After I complained, she suggested that I untangle my Ethernet cord so that more Internet could get through."
  • "I recently joined an online dating site, and one of my matches was my first cousin."